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STAND UP COMEDY
For One Night Only-at the Audience’s Request
Comedian: Thank you, thank you. Thank you very much. Good evening-or let’s hope so.
My son once asked me whether there have been any famous shipwrecks in England. I said, ‘Only my comedy career.’
Actually, I delight people with my rare performances. Not because I’m performing, but because they’re rare.
I personally believe I’m an undiagnosed comedy genius.
Heckler: You got that right!
Comedian: Hey, stop heckling! I come from an alternative universe where the comedians throw fruit at the audience.
Some of you are obviously wondering how I got into stand up. Well, it all began when I applied for an office job. On arriving for the interview, the secretary shouted, ‘We’ve got some joker here who thinks we’d like to employ him!’